How are you supposed to feel when your first child turns 18? I’ve been asking myself this question all day.

There are so many facets to my feelings today that I don’t know if a single blog could sum it all up.

Eighteen years ago today, I fell hopelessly in love. And now after all that time, unlike some long-term romances, I’m more in love than ever.

Kayleigh Hannah was born today. So, now I’m left to deal with my feelings about my baby becoming an adult…

Well, there’s the tiniest bit of feeling really old, then there’s a lot of feelings like “where did the time go?”. There’s a slight panicky feeling wishing I could slow down time…just for a little while, then there’s excitement to see all that my little girl is going to do with her life. There’s a ton of pride at how strong, yet compassionate she is, and there’s also a feeling of awe that God blessed me with her to begin with.

I realized on her first birthday that having children…and loving them so much is very bittersweet - more sweet than bitter, of course - but the reality is that if you do your job well, they will go…

…from her first step she’s been going - and, in some ways, I feel like I’ve been holding my breath and counting the days ’til now. And now it’s here.

And it’s definitely more sweet than bitter - it has to be when I see what a lovely woman my baby has become.

So, HAPPY EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY, KAYLEIGH HANNAH!!! There is no sadness when I think of your life, your future, and all the joy you bring to those who love you.

You rock, and I love you so.

P.S. As soon as I figure out how to do pics with the new wordpress layout, I’ll post some “cute” ones…unless you convince me otherwise…
Love, Mommy.