so tomorrow we leave for texas…
only half of our kids are going with us, since the girls are at youth camp - it’s so weird to think of traveling without them. i’m still trying to wrap my mind around the whole “it’s been TWENTY YEARS since i graduated from high school” thing! i feel like i’m in the twilight zone when i think about it for too long…
of course, that’s nothing new really…
what’s also weird is that we walked into our favorite little beach “restaurant” (more like a cross between an ice cream shop and a healthy sandwich shop)…anyway, we walked in to order “burritos” made with black beans, veggies and brown rice, and the owner says, “hey! it’s byron!” then to her employee at the cash register, “this is his favorite place in town!”… (i’m thinking, “what am i? chopped liver? i’ve been here practically every day too!!”).
anyway, she apparently likes byron…a lot! oh well, since she’s a good bit older than he is, i guess i’ll let it slide… :-) but i’m keeping my eye on her…his burrito did seem significantly larger than mine…..
…i think we’re going there for breakfast too - she said to call in our order first thing and she’d have it waiting for him…i mean, us…hmm (maybe i should hit the gym before i go!).
i’m just joking around…really!
anyway, so we’re going to texas tomorrow…
and i really need to get some beauty sleep…i mean, rest tonight. (and that has nothing to do with byron’s “friend” who makes amazing food!)
really!…peace.
so we leave in a couple of days to go back to texas for our 20th high school reunion…
thinking about how much time has passed is surreal…but of course it also seems like a lifetime ago…i guess that’s how life is.
this week i conquered some demons of my old age, though:
- i let myself “tan” even though i’m nearing 40 and i’ve been a freak about not aging my skin over the past couple of years.
- i wore a two piece bathing suit on the beach…with no cover-up! of course, i banned photos and got back in my chair very quickly…but, it’s progress.
- i went to the grocery store with no makeup…and no sunglasses - of course, we were in a small beach town where i knew no one…baby steps…
- we had family pictures taken on the beach…early in the a.m., and we were not only “on time”, but the photographer said we were the only family he could remember actually being early!
- one night - with my friend Karla - i ate tons of twizzlers and spoonfuls of peanut butter (not the “all natural” kind either!) - i felt like i was a teenager again…at least til i couldn’t feel my arms anymore.
every time i get in the sun, a war takes place inside me…
my native american roots love the sun and want me to get all dark and caramel colored. my eastern european/scotch/welsh roots…well, not so much - they would prefer air conditioning and spf 70!
up until friday, the indian side was winning out…not a peep from the other side! but somewhere in the wee hours of friday morning, i started itching….
yep, sun poisoning! (every time i say that, i think of “a christmas story” and “soap poisoning!”…).
so, after services tomorrow (cu@c3!), we’ll head back over to the beach…and i’ll head back under an umbrella and lots of white flowy cover-ups…oh yeah, and spf 70! oh well, at least i’m tanner than i was a couple of weeks ago!
so, that’s it…all i’ve got!
now i just want to go watch “a christmas story” and eat twizzlers and peanut butter…but i won’t - because i have to come back to the real world some time…
baby steps…
peace out.
I feel like being at the beach is good for me…I spend so much time thinking…reflecting. Sitting by the edge of the ocean seems like the perfect place to just let things go - to send them away with the tide…
…the problem is that in my highly pensive and reflective state, I tend to mull things over again…and again. And then it’s like it all comes back…washing over me like the waves keep returning to shore…again and again.
So, I’m trying to find the balance - I’m trying to reflect less…unless it’s to reflect on the goodness of God. It’s just a struggle for me lately…
…there have been so many things that keep on returning like the waves….I’m just in a testing time right now.
The crashing waves are magnificent in their power and beauty…but they also can be overwhelming…washing over things…taking them under…
…then what’s left is some beautiful glitter on the sand.
Pray for me.
Peace.
i love sparkly things…glitter…etcetera. most people who know me, know that.
so i was thrilled to discover that the beach here has it’s own form of glitter on the sand.
it’s gorgeous.
nate said, “look mom, it’s glitter!” then, “oh great, now she won’t see anything else…”
so i did look at it…closely. and i realized it was finely ground shells and coral left by the overnight tide - discarded by the crashing surf…
so what i enjoyed…what just looked like pretty decoration to me - was really the evidence of many years of trial and breaking down by the pounding waves.
the real beauty was only there after the brokenness…
anyway, it’s what i was thinking about when i woke up this morning.
and now i love sparkly things just a little more even though the process…the sea of change can feel overwhelming at times.
peace.
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