Archive for the 'jokes' CategoryPage 3 of 6

Happy “Blondessified” Wednesday…in review

My dear friend Kristin (in Texas…from high school) sent me this. I saved it for “Happy Wednesday” - it’s awesome!!

Blonde’s Year in Review…

January
Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February
Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels…..
Helllloooo!!!……bottles won’t fit in printer !!!

March
Got really excited…..finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months….. box said “2-4 years!”

April
Trapped on escalator for hours, power went out!!!

May
Tried to make Kool-Aid…..wrong instructions….8 cups of water won’t fit into those little packets!!!

June
Tried to go water skiing…….couldn’t find a lake with a slope.

July
Lost breast stroke swimming competition……learned later , the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August
Got locked out of my car in rain storm….. car swamped because soft-top was open.

September
The capital of California is “C”…..isn’t it???

October
Hate M & M’s…..they are so hard to peel .

November
Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days…, instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!

December
Couldn’t call 911 ….. “duh”…..there’s no “eleven” Button on the stupid phone!!!

THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR:

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.

She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house.

A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, “Is something wrong?”

To which she replied, “There certainly is!”

(Are you ready? This is a beauty..)

My stupid computer keeps saying, “YOU’VE GOT MAIL!”

So, it’s another Wednesday…another day to celebrate all the little funny things that make us smile.

Every smile is a gift! I hope you are blessed with an abundance today…

Peace out!

Happy, Happy…

I’ve decided that today’s the day to clean out and organize my kitchen pantry…among fourteen other projects that I’ve decided to take on at the last minute (there are fifty or so people coming to my house in a little over 48 hours!!!!)…

So…I don’t really have time to celebrate - BUT IT IS HAPPY WEDNESDAY, SO…

Let’s all pause and take a moment to reflect on what “Happy Wednesday” is really all about - I think it all boils down to one thing:

Good, clean blonde jokes. If you have any, let me know.

Hurray for dumb blondes! Long may they reign and provide material for all of us, everywhere, needing a little comic relief at the expense of someone else - or, in my case, at the expense of my own self.

Have a happy, blonde joke-filled, Wednesday.

Seriously, I’m tapped out in the joke department, and I don’t have time to search for any more today…so, if you know a good one, share it with me.

Have a great one. Peace out!

Blonde Ambition - (at least she’s not speeding!)

Blonde Driver
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wx_8GI4DGRo]
It’s not “Happy Wednesday”, but this made me chuckle.

Apparently, this blonde doesn’t do numbers either…

Peace out.

Blonde Ambition - (at least she’s not speeding!)

Blonde Driver
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wx_8GI4DGRo]
It’s not “Happy Wednesday”, but this made me chuckle.

Apparently, this blonde doesn’t do numbers either…

Peace out.